I’d been drinking white tea (which is like green tea but “softer) all afternoon in an effort to keep my mind alert and my body less chilled. It was 4:00pm and I was weary and cold. I found myself wondering: What’s causing this?
Is it the weather – 12 degrees with a wind chill that’s bone chilling? It’s been hours since I walked the dogs, but I still feel the cold going through me. Should I “google” to see if people with MS have trouble getting warm after being cold? Maybe I’m tired because I haven’t been walking outside as much because of the cold – I’ve read about the need to get Vit D from the sun and mine has been down the past few days. Or, maybe this tiredness is due to this being a post “Avonex” day, meaning the day after I take Avonex (I drug for the multiple sclerosis). Sometimes I’m a bit out of sorts, physically and emotionally, on those days. I’m trying to remember — did I go to sleep later than usual last night?
Ahh, when I did some “Focusing” (a technique I’ve learned from Ann Weiser Cornell, http://www.focusingresources.com/index.html ) I experienced a shift from wondering “What is making me so tired” to “There’s something that is very tired in me.”
And, somehow that lets me feel much lighter and even somewhat warmer. I remembering, yet again, that it doesn’t matter what creates the experience of illness. I can manage my experience of it, though, so it doesn’t become me.
Rosalind
Diana says
Dear Rosalind,
Thank you very much for sharing this. The distinction between determining the cause of a discomfort and embracing the experience is important. You have been helping me with Focusing, and your guidance today brought this messaqge home. For the first time I can remember, I wasn’t fretting about what was going on. I let go to what my body was telling me, and simply listening brought a calm to my entire day. I was able to work and be productive, which hasn’t been easy lately. And even now, late at night, I was able to shunt a panic attack that has been keeping me awake by returning to this calm.
Would you please explain more about the application of focusing to issues related to our illnesses? In addition to using focusing to check in, as you described, do people also use it through a series of sessions to follow a particular thread or idea, or is this too forced and, instead, should each session be directed purely by what our bodies are telling us?
Diana
Rosalind says
Diana, I don’t consider myself an expert in Focusing (http://www.focusingresources.com/index.html) so it’s difficult for me to answer this as fully as I’d like. According to Ann Weiser Corrnell, in her book, The Power of Focusing, nothing is forced in Focusing. From my own experience, it’s a wonderful vehicle for exploring the same topic over and over again. By the way, there is a free phone seminar on Focusing on Pain (http://www.focusingresources.com/workshops/freeseminars.html) that Ann will be giving in April.
Warmly, Rosalind