At the Kelly Packowski Foundation for MS, Kelly described how her conversations with grant recipients helped her to realize that she hasn’t accepted that she has this illness.
I talk about this a lot with clients — and other people who contact me — so I was really intrigued by this. She said that she still behaves as if she doesn’t have an illness.
I commented that maybe this isn’t such a bad thing. In my experience, some people are afraid of pushing when they have an illness. And in the effort to keep it under “control”, they lose all sense of hope and engagement.
But she didn’t buy that. She thinks that when she pushes too hard, she gets sick and she’s got to learn to stop before she gets to that point – for her two young children and her husband.
People come to me worried that their job is making them sicker — it’s so stressful. We don’t need a boss to tell us the deadlines have to be met or that we’re not doing enough.
Now, Kelly doesn’t have a boss. Her jobs include, among other things, taking care of two children and running the foundation. Yet, even without external pressures from co-workers and a supervisor, she finds that she pushes herself to her limits and beyond.
You don’t have to be sick to struggle with this. But illness makes it even more important that this not be your struggle. It helps to have a vision. Start by asking yourself: in the next year (or 3 or 5) what do I want my life to be?
Rosalind
Karen says
I have MS. It’s all in my head. Seriously, it is in my head. I get dizzy. (My friends tell me that’s nothing new. ha, ha) It’s like waking up every morning having had one-to-many. I figure, everybody has something that’s breaking down in one way or another. It’s just called something else.
So, I go out in my garden, cut my grass, shovel the snow, clean the house, etc. I used to do community theater. Running around on stage isn’t doable, so I go out and sing Karaoke instead. I know it’s time to slow down when I feel like I’m going to FALL down. But, I need to keep doing these things because they make me feel good. I can still move.
Rosalind says
Hooray for you, Karen. It is all in our head – what we think creates our behavior. Maybe instead of running around on stage you might try walking:). You’re so right to keep moving — and doing what you can do! Rosalind
Rosalind says
HI Karen
I forgot to ask – do you miss working in community theater? Rosalind
Karen says
Yes, Rosalind, I do, very much. I love to perform. And ha, ha, ha to your response. Can’t get a break. Anyway…When there are fast costume changes or running from the left to the right backstage for an entrance, being dizzy can be a bit of a hindrance. (Depending on the theater, stairs can be involved.) Even Karaoke can be challenging. I’d like something to hang on to. When I really get into a song, it seems to affect my head. Go figure. But it’s fun anyway. When the singing’s done, I’m done. Can’t let it stop. laaaaaaaaaaaaa! Well, gotta go. I’ll be looking for your next mailings.
Bye.